It’s hard to get laid off, especially when you do great work. This week, we hear from a tech leader who lost his job and has lost his confidence, too.
Michele,
What do you do when you’ve lost your confidence? I’m a Type-A guy who had a good job at one of the “Magnificent Seven” companies. I was shocked when I got laid off in one of the many downsizings that happened this year. My reviews had been very good but they needed to make their numbers so I was out the door. I made a lateral move when I took that job, going from managing a team to being a solo contributor. I worry that my resume doesn’t look that great when you look at my last job, and I wonder what I am really capable of doing. As the months pass by, I feel more and more like an unhireable impostor. What do you recommend I do now?
Appreciate you,
Former Tech Bro
Dear Tech Bro,
You’ve suffered a huge dislocation - what a friend calls “an identity earthquake” - and since so many of us define ourselves by what we do, no wonder you’re having a tough time.
Here’s the thing: I’ve always believed that when you know your strengths, your values, your priorities and your temperament, things get easier.
So how do you figure out your strengths, values, priorities and temperament?
There are a couple of assessments I can recommend:
The VIA Character Strengths Survey - fortunately, this one is available at no charge
CliftonStrengths - there is a fee for this one
When you receive your results, study them. Do they feel right? Dig in to the strengths at the top of the list and ask: Am I using these every day?
Am I also using these words to explain to employers who I am and what I can do for them?
On Values, you can use this helpful tool. When you’re finished, compare your values and your strengths. Any dots you can connect? Any themes emerging?
When it comes to priorities, you can use a tool I created: Personal Planning Tool. This one is designed to give you a chance to reflect and drives you toward creating priorities. You don’t need to finish it in one sitting like some random magazine quiz - take your time, be thoughtful, and chip away at it.
Your priorities may reveal something interesting to you. I had a client who discovered that one of the reasons she was disengaged from her work was because it was actually her sixth priority, behind her health, her family, her living situation and nearly everything else - and had a bit of paralyzing cognitive dissonance that she “should” prioritize work. Things improved for her when she accepted that her job was a means to an end for a finite period - not an end in and of itself, and she wasn’t a slacker. She just had a lot on her plate at the moment.
You may discover something surprising, too.
Then, the final piece of the puzzle. Your temperament. If you’re not working with an executive coach who has access to assessments, you can do your own personal review. Would you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert? How do you like to behave in groups? Are you quick to action, or are you systematic and planful? You might pull together any assessments you took in your most recent jobs as well as your performance reviews and add them to your data points.
What do these things show you about yourself and how you do what you do?
When you collect all this information on your strengths, values, priorities and temperament, you will have insight into how you’re wired, and you may remember things about yourself that you’ve forgotten since you lost your job.
You may also have a renewed sense of where you need to go next. And to help you get yourself going, you can read this.
Remember that the vast majority of jobs are filled by personal referral, so make sure you’re reaching out to your former colleagues who’ve landed new roles, or who are already in good jobs.
These folks know you, like you, and know what you’re capable of doing.
But your energy matters, too. When you feel good about yourself and know - with no doubt - that you can create success in your next job, your energy becomes infectious. People will be drawn to you, and opportunities will open up.
You just have to take a deep breath and remember who you are.